Hola friends! I hope you all had a great weekend and Monday back to work. I needed a day to digest my weekend. Kind of literally too. Ugh. Now I’m back to chat with you about it. Sorry, this is going to be another sort of depressingly serious post.
Let me start by saying I’m on an alcohol break. I don’t know how long I’m on a break for, but at least until next weekend (8/2).
I got really serious with myself on Sunday night while attempting to fall asleep and decided this is what I need right now. I would like to go longer than 8/2, but I don’t think that’s really feasible for me. I do know that I am going to be very cautious with alcohol on 8/2 and beyond. I just have to be.
Okay, now let’s chat about the weekend. It was really fun, but in my usual fashion, I’m able to remember the not-so-fun moments the most.
Friday afternoon 7 of us arrived in Crosslake, MN for a weekend of fun. I arrived first, so I enjoyed a mini bottle of wine while I waited.
That wasn’t the best idea. It was about 1:30pm, and I hadn’t eaten lunch yet. I was starving. I didn’t eat until I was into the second mini bottle, which was too late. Drinking before eating never works out for me.
Needless to say, we still had fun. The guys went off golfing, so us 3 girls went exploring in the campground/park across the street from our hotel. Then we had drinks on our little hotel patio while waiting for the guys to get done golfing. After that it was dinner at Zorbas (I had PB and pepperoni pizza… holy freaking yum!) and a dance party at a club. It was very weird to us that they have a club in Crosslake. It’s a tiny lake town, so it was definitely not what we were expecting. It was still so fun!
Saturday found us girls laying out on a dock in the campground/park across from our hotel while the guys golfed again. It was 4 hours of some sun, some floating, and a lot of chatting. I think that was my favorite part of the weekend!
The rest of the evening was spent dealing with our guys who had too much to drink on the golf course, pigging out on Italian food (my stomach still hurts thinking about it), playing in/by the pool (I didn’t want to get wet again), and an early bedtime for me. I was tired and my foot hurt. Somebody had to make good decisions (finally)!
Sunday we stopped at a Mexican joint for more gorging and drinks before coming home. I then proceeded to overeat the rest of the day. I probably ate a good 5,000 calories every day this weekend. Lovely.
Finally, yesterday morning found me super bloated with wicked heartburn and gas. I was a lovely creature yesterday! That’s when I really got serious with myself. This excess drinking and eating has got to stop. How am I ever going to feel good and be healthy if I am eating and drinking in excess every weekend? I won’t. So I’m done.
I’ve been half-ass tracking my food on MyFitnessPal for a while now, but yesterday I got serious with it. I need limits. I just do. Without them, I will stretch all boundaries. So I gave myself a limit of having a 250+ calorie deficit a day. I’m really aiming for 500, but I want to go easy on myself. Restriction doesn’t work for me, but reasonable limits do. I also need to remind myself that I’m not doing this to be skinny, but to be fit and healthy. Oh and happy. Because I can’t keep doing what I’m doing. If I continue on this path, I will be extremely obese and a drunk in not too long. Maybe suicidal too. Seriously.
Okay, sorry to bring you all down today! I’m just being open and honest. I’m actually feeling really good right now. I think it’s because I know I’m taking steps to get on the right path. The right path for me that is. You’re path is likely different from mine, and that’s a-okay.